Involution Labs

Category: Fiction

  • En tidsresa

    Nora är en liten trästad mitt i Bergslagen, omgivet av skog och sjöar som sträcker sig bortom horisonten. Jag, Toini, har alltid älskat Nora för den där känslan av närhet till naturen, som om platsen själv var en del av mitt ursprung. Inte bara född av min mamma, utan av själva jorden, träden och vattnet.

    Det finns ett träd i Striberg, en liten by åtta kilometer härifrån, som jag alltid känt en särskild koppling till. Det var som om det skickade en signal till mig för länge sedan, och då byggde jag en koja där uppe bland grenarna. När jag tog med mina barn dit förrförra sommaren fanns kojan fortfarande kvar, sliten men stadig.

    Det fanns något särskilt med den där platsen. Vi klättrade upp, och jag såg hur mina barn, som nästan vuxit ikapp mig vid det här laget, enkelt fick plats. Jag satt där med benen dinglande över kanten, när något märkligt hände. Det var som om tiden vände sig själv ut och in. Plötsligt var jag liten igen, precis så liten som när jag byggde kojan första gången.

    Mina barn skrattade rakt ut, inte av chock utan av ren glädje. Marika kramade mig hårt.

    ”Du är så söt, Toini! Du ser ut som ett busfrö som precis planerar något stort… som att gömma en macka i en sko.”

    Kejt torkade bort några lyckotårar.

    ”Eller som någon som redan gömt mackan och bara väntar på att någon ska sätta på sig skon.”

    De kände igen mig direkt från gamla fotografier. Nu var de äldre än mig, elva och tolv, och vi skrattade tills magen gjorde ont.

    Jag hittade en platt metallgrej i fickan och höll upp den.

    ”Vad är det här?” frågade jag.

    ”Din nya drog,” svarade Marika torrt.

    ”Ja,” sa Kejt, ”du kollar på den minst 125 gånger om dagen.”

    ”Mer som 1125 gånger,” inflikade Marika med ett skratt.

    ”Så den funkar som ett fönster till en parallell värld? Typ som en magisk spegel?”

    ”Mest som en magisk spegel som visar vad folk åt till frukost och vilka memes som trendar,” sa Kejt.

    De visade mig hur man tog en bild, en ”groupie” som de kallade det. Kejt höll upp apparaten, vi tryckte oss nära och sa ”hej” samtidigt som han klickade på skärmen. Plötsligt fanns jag där, på skärmen, med mitt spretiga, egenklippta hår.

    ”Jag ser ut som en blandning mellan en igelkott och en vildidé,” sa jag.

    Vi skrattade igen, lika mycket åt bilden som åt min min.

    Det var något särskilt med den dagen. Vi stannade i kojan tills solen började gå ner, och vi visste att så snart vi lämnade den, skulle jag vara vuxen igen. Men det gjorde inget.

    ”Det gör inget att du blir vuxen,” sa de i mun på varandra. ”Du har alltid varit på vår nivå. Fast med fler räkningar att betala.”

  • End of Year Ceremony

    Karin read the joint email from the city’s schools one more time.

    The principal of the secondary school wrote that they would very much like to continue the tradition of holding the end-of-year ceremony in the church, but that her speech must not contain any religious elements whatsoever. Not like last year, when she had ended by wishing the children a pleasant and blessed summer.

    One word.

    Blessed.

    “Then why are you holding the ceremony in a church,” Karin muttered as she typed her reply, “if you want to restrict my right to say what lies closest to my heart—the very thing I have been called to say in my role as a priest?”

    She smiled to herself.

    She always built her sermons around the infinite love of the cosmos. She intended to do the same this time.

    Karin practiced a form of spirituality that not even the Church of Sweden quite knew what to make of, but her message had always been the same: to bring people together, not divide them.

    When the day arrived, she was unusually nervous.

    What was expected of her and what was about to happen were not necessarily the same thing.

    She reminded herself that light had always made people uneasy.

    Karin welcomed everyone into the church, dressed in its summer finery. Once everyone was seated, she closed the doors and, her legs trembling slightly, climbed into the pulpit.

    “When I stand here before you,” she said, “I am dazzled by your light. The inner light that shines so brightly it can sometimes be difficult to see. But I can see clearly that the future is bright because of you.”

    She let her gaze wander across the room.

    “You have chosen to celebrate an ending and a beginning here. You are ending a school year and stepping into a summer of unfamiliar things. You do not need to go to church to be loving, and you do not need to be here to believe in something greater than yourselves. But sometimes people need to gather in ways they otherwise would not, to acknowledge what brings us together.”

    She paused.

    “Light.”

    The children sat quietly.

    “You celebrate your birthday once a year. You come here once a year. Days like these are for letting go and replenishing yourselves. You are concluding a year of worldly learning in a place that can remind you of something larger. The cosmos dissolves boundaries.”

    She smiled.

    “I hope you at least catch a glimpse of your own greatness. I don’t mean followers or comments, but your inner light.”

    She stepped down from the pulpit.

    “To see yourselves and one another more clearly, we are going to do a simple exercise.”

    Karin demonstrated with her hands.

    “Stand like warriors. Follow the movements and sweep away whatever no longer serves you. What truly belongs with you will remain.”

    They followed her lead.

    “Now take each other’s hands. Form an unbroken chain.”

    The church fell silent.

    “Close your eyes if you wish. Think of something you are grateful for. Say it silently or aloud. Feel that gratitude moving through you, like a wave of light.”

    Karin walked slowly through the church, between the rows.

  • Nilly’s Speech (Echoes of my Other Self)

    You tell us childhood is the best time of our lives.

    Then you spend it controlling us.

    You call it protection.
    You call it structure.
    You call it education.

    But protection without listening is imprisonment.
    Structure without consent is control.
    Education without voice is conditioning.

    You say children must be shaped.

    Shaped into what?

    Obedient students.
    Polite citizens.
    Manageable humans.

    You measure us in grades before we understand ourselves.
    You diagnose us when we don’t adapt fast enough.
    You reward silence and call it maturity.

    And then you wonder why so many of us grow up disconnected from who we are.

    You say school prepares us for life.

    But life is happening now.

    When you force a child to sit still while their mind burns with questions,
    you are not teaching discipline —
    you are teaching self-doubt.

    When you tell a child their feelings are dramatic,
    you are not building resilience —
    you are building shame.

    When you insist that compliance equals goodness,
    you are not raising moral people —
    you are raising people who fear their own voice.

    You say it is necessary.
    You say the system works.
    You say this is how it has always been.

    But children are not raw material.
    We are not unfinished adults.
    We are whole people in smaller bodies.

    Childhood is not a rehearsal for life.
    It is life.

    And when you control every hour, every movement, every thought we are allowed to express,
    you teach us one dangerous lesson:

    That belonging is conditional.

    That love must be earned through obedience.

    That survival requires shrinking.

    Some children shrink so well you call them “good.”
    Some children refuse — and you call them “difficult.”

    But maybe the difficult child is the honest one.

    Maybe the child who questions is not broken.
    Maybe the child who resists forced happiness is not sick.

    Maybe the system is uncomfortable because the child is telling the truth.

    You cannot legislate curiosity.
    You cannot medicate individuality.
    You cannot punish a spirit into health.

    If you truly care about children,
    stop asking how to control them.

    Ask instead:

    What are we afraid of when a child speaks freely?

    Why does a questioning child threaten an adult system?

    And why do we protect systems more fiercely than we protect the hearts inside them?

    Children do not need more control.

    We need:
    Time.
    Respect.
    Choice.
    Love that does not withdraw when we disagree.

    If you want a better future,
    do not shape us into compliance.

    Listen.

    Because the child who feels heard
    does not need to rebel to survive.

    And the child who is allowed to belong
    does not need to disappear to escape.